Over the last couple of months I found out I have a real tendency to go for older men. It didn’t use to be like this but I then slowly began to understand there were a few reasons behind this change in my preferences.
This is something that is still very frowned upon in our society but that I found to be very natural when in one of these situations: a 21 year old woman dating older men.
The first thought on everyone’s mind is always that the girl is dating the guy for his money. So I’ll start by saying that I’m aware that this is the case for many girls who actively seek “sugar daddies” who’ll pay for everything they want but I’m not a materialistic girl, recently I’ve even stopped wearing makeup; I also have enough of my own money to pay for my own beers and the occasional dinner out.
With that out of the way, these are the reasons I will continue to date older men even if everyone else finds it weird.
1. A lot less BS
Every older man I dated was very upfront about his intentions. No encrypted messages, no hidden meanings, no games. I think that’s what I hate the most about men my age, I never know what they’re thinking and they’re never sincere about what they want – probably because they don’t know either.
Either way, when it comes to men I’m very direct, I like saying everything when I feel like it. And while most twenty somethings will find it a turn off – because they were already expecting me to play games -, older men actually appreciate it, probably because they’ve lost enough time to that.
2. They will value you more
Being with a younger woman, a man will appreciate traits of your body and personality that usually go unnoticed. Your constant smile, your joy, never ending energy. They will also adore your body – if you’re not into being touched a lot you might find it annoying – if you are, then you’ll love it. It’s no secret that all men appreciate the bodies of young women, with firm skin and perky attributes, and they will make sure to let you know that and consequently make you feel more desirable.
3. More cultured and mature
While I might not be exceptionally smart, I take pride in being cultured and more mature than most people my age. If you’re like me and like challenging conversations, this will make up for an interesting dynamic. You’ll be trying to keep up with someone who has a lot more experience and who’ve been around a fair bit. It’s challenging and if you’re able to keep them engaged then you might as well be on a higher level than you initially thought and that’s pretty satisfying. You can also learn a lot and I honestly just love to listen to travel stories and nod while fantasizing about going to those same places in my head.
4. You feel safer
Ok, on this one we could argue that you will feel safer hanging out with/being held by an older man because he’s more of a paternal figure and some might find that creepy but honestly that is just perfectly natural. It’s also why you don’t feel as attracted to small, skinny guys with more juvenile features.
5. Last but not least: they make for great sexual partners
Yes, this one was missing. Truth is they’ve probably dated all kinds of women by now. They know what to do and are confident on what they’re doing and that’s extremely sexy. They’ve figured out by now that women are not the same as men and will take their time to give you pleasure knowing that you’ll return the favor afterwards. They’ve also probably done it all and make for good partners if there’s something new you want to experiment with. There’s also a more mature approach to the whole thing, instead of getting hyper on high expectations and excitement for it to end up in mediocre sex.
I’m not saying you should only date older guys or that you should even date them at all. I’m just saying it’s an experience that you can find pleasurable and that might make up for some sexy flings and cool memories. I’m also not talking about dating a man who could be your grandfather even though that’s ok too if it’s what you’re into.
Inevitably, there will be differences you might not be able to tolerate but it is absolutely possible for two people with a “big” age gap between them to share good times and ultimately it would be cool for people to stop giving a shit about the age gap all together.